Restless | Forrest Gump’s Feather

I wrote an Instagram post about this a while back, but I always wanted to write about the simile between the Switchfoot song Restless and a beloved scene from one of my favorite movies.

Story time. I was a camp counselor for 8 weeks in the Summer of 2018. It was an amazing experience where I truly felt close to God, loved on kids, and felt the true impact of pouring my soul into something and seeing the impact firsthand.

In the same breath, it was the hardest summer of my life. Tendonitis returned to my bad knee from high school as well as gaining the condition in my right knee caused constant swelling and pain. There was a day where I was in the nurses office with another counselor where I had ice packs on both knees and we were sharing an ice pack between our two ankles, true story. We laughed and all, but the physical and emotional toll weighed on me heavily.

I was burdened with entering nursing school in weeks, preparing to propose to my sweet wife Isabel, and knew this job was in many ways my final shot at the camp counselor experience. In hindsight the uncertain future ahead of me certainly was playing a role in my heart, whether I liked it or not. Not every person is cookie cutter camp counselor material and finding my style in that was also a struggle.

This was around when I started diving into Switchfoot again. Switchfoot has always provided me fun, comfort, and solace, but I didn’t identify that until that summer. Every week before the campers came, my tradition became hopping in my car and going on a long drive around Tyler, TX, blaring Restless and Vice Verses as I pulled back into camp.

I am the sea on a moonless night,

Calling falling, slipping tides

…

I am the raindrop falling down,

Always longing for the deeper ground

I am the broken, breaking, seas

Even my blood finds ways to bleed

I was extremely restless. I’ve had my times of happiness and recovery, but if I’m being 100% genuine, right now, I am restless once more. What is my dream job? How are things going to play out for my family? Will I be able to afford the big house for my future family?

These are some of many thoughts that swirl my head on the daily. Often when I listen to this song I think of the key scene in one of my favorite movies…

Forrest Gump

I could talk for hours about the movie that is Forrest Gump, but right now, there’s only one scene I’m bringing up:

Forrest ,despite all his struggles and successes, reaches this profound thought:

I don’t know if Mama was right, or if it’s Lt. Dan. I don’t know if we each have a destiny, or if we’re all just floating around accidental like on a breeze. But I think, maybe it’s both. Maybe both is happening at the same time. I miss you, Jenny.

This is the big hitter — the whole movie’s been building up to this one statement. It’s why the feathers there at all! What is meaning, right?

And we bring it back to Restless. Jon and Forrest are screaming the same thoughts inside, but Jon figures it out.

I am restless, I am restless, I am restless

Looking for you

I am restless,

I run like the ocean to find your shore,

Looking for you

“I can hear you breathing

I can hear you leading

More than just a feeling

More than just a feeling

I can feel you reaching,

Pushing through the ceiling,

’Til the final healing,

I’m looking for you

…

I’ll be waiting,

Anticipating,

All that I am for,

What I was made for

Sorry for the lyric dump, but you get the idea. Like Forrest, Jon is ‘floating around all accidental like on a breeze’ but Jon, like me, believes in Jesus.

In the middle of the hurt, in the middle of the unknown, if you look for God, you will find Him. Moreover, Jesus comes and meets you in your suffering.

Psalms 27:11–14 says,

Teach me your way, O Lord,
and lead me on a level path
because of my enemies.

Give me not up to the will of my adversaries;
for false witnesses have risen against me,
and they breathe out violence.

I believe that I shall look upon the goodness of the Lord
in the land of the living!

Wait for the Lord;
be strong, and let your heart take courage;
wait for the Lord!

David encountered enemies that were spiritual very much as he encountered physical enemies (his son tried to overthrow him for Pete’s sake). David, a man after God’s own heart, screams after the Lord to save him all through Psalms. And God reaches out his strong, loving hand.

If you’re feeling doubt, pain, depression, whatever it is, the enemy is real, and you need to seek help. Seek God, and seek the opportunities He’s given you (counseling, therapy, medicine and the like). You are not alone. The world can be discouraging, but Jesus says,

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.

(John 16:33)